5 SIGNS YOU’RE IN YOUR INFJ VILLAIN ORIGIN STORY (And How to Own It)
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- Опубликовано: 29 мар 2025
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INFJ Life Coach Lesson: Every INFJ eventually reaches a point where they’re done playing the healer, the giver, the martyr-done being endlessly selfless while silently depleted. That’s the moment we step into our INFJ villain era-not because we’ve become cruel or heartless, but because we’ve finally claimed our boundaries, our power, and our right to protect our energy. For many INFJs, being a “villain” simply means becoming the bad guy in someone else’s story for finally choosing ourselves. In this video, we’ll dive into five powerful signs that you’ve entered your villain era-and why that’s not something to fear, but to embrace as a necessary step toward becoming your most authentic, grounded, and self-respecting self.
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INFJs-have you ever felt like you had to burn everything down just to finally choose yourself? Which one of these signs hit you the hardest? Let’s talk about it below
In this space now. There’s no one exempt from being cutoff. Either they understand the vision and want to partake and/or root for me or they get castaway like Tom Hanks. I still care a lot for others but there’s no more straddling the fence. One speed!
love that haircut.
Omg! I'm living this right now
I'm still a giver, giver, giver, to the point of sometimes wanting to load up the car and just drive away, not because of the people I give to, but because of the fear of the repercussions of deciding to say no every once in awhile. Knowing that certain people will ignore my wishes and certain people may just abandon me.
We give both out of love and out of fear, separating those two things once deeply entwined can be difficult. Not only do we give to those we love, we may also give a lot quickly to people who have not earned our time, attention or our trust.
I don't know why is so hard for people to understand this. Few weeks ago I watched a video about the street smart tactics of the sigma archetype, made a comment about it and one of my viewers wrote a comment about „I don't want to take the world as a place of predators and pray“. It's no matter if you understand it or not, it's about is it true and of course it is and there are times in which you have to be „not nice“ and sometimes even pray for forgiveness, fearing that you react too much, but that's the price of development and passionate advocacy. Today's people are taught to perceive life on the principle of stagnation and do not understand that energies and influences are constantly changing and you cannot fixate on a certain behavior and identification and count on not falling behind at some point. I am tired of listening to people, especially young people under 30, who want their lives to be like in fairy tales "and lived happily ever after", no, it does not happen like that. Reality is completely different. As long as we are alive we have to fight for our happiness and well-being every day. That is why it is said that people are sinful because three-dimensional reality is not perfect.
I am not Evil . I am a result
Found out I was an INFJ several years ago. Now 91 years old. After listening to this video, I realize I've been in my villian stage for about 5 years. My villianous behaviour is to not let anyone off the hook when they're lying, bullsh*tting or displaying obnoxious/abusive behaviour toward myself or a more vulnerable person. I believe this came about when I really knew myself and felt comfortable in my own skin. Other than that, I'm still an INFJ at heart.
@@billfarley9167 ✨️⚔️✨️
This was great to read that you can fight back at 91. It is inspiring.I recently really started to tell the world how fed up I am with the treatment I have received. It has not gone down well but I have neglected my own needs and have realised how much trouble my body is in. It is basically put me first or die.
I just realized I need to become a villain
@@Test-wi5pt Yes. Being comfortable in your own skin means you have the means to be tolerant, patient and understanding, not only toward yourself, but to others. It also means you can use those attributes to maintain your dignity and honour toward yourself. In the end, anger is really not productive. Perhaps the negative treatment you received was because you gave away your power to others. And I don't mean power in a negative way. Maintaing your power means to feel comfortable with who you are and to hold on to your principles, no matter what.
@@activedogzz In the context of the INFJ, yes. Because in the end, each of us also has the responsibility to remain honest, trustworthy, compassionate and caring.
Shrinking into small spaces to please little people has wrecked me as an INFJ. Trying to please those who can’t be pleased and to fit societal molds and standards. It wasn’t worth it. Not in my villain era but definitely respecting my boundaries, dreams, desires, and destiny.
this is EFFING WILD!!!!! i JUST put my foot down the other day.......... PERFECT TIMING!!!
Me too. And the other person is currently not speaking to me 🤭
Me too !~ I said those exact words to myself; :" fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice...shame on ME !"
How did you do it?
INFJ topic: People want to harness you. Don't let them.
I've had others try to push me down to show dominance. Don't let them make you as miserable as themselves.
Edit: Let me elaborate. Sometimes, you will get people, it doesn't matter if they are an authoritative figure or not, who wants to make you. They will try in some way to harness your seemingly boundless energy. Let's face it, it would actually be impressive for that person to have that kind of control, we all have something to give or show. They do this as a way to show others; look who listens to me. We as INFJs must recognize that this individual needs boundaries. They're going about it the wrong way, and to let them get away means we'll be drained faster.
It's hard to set boundaries that will not make people feel like they're attacked. Own it, for your peace of mind.
EXACTLY!
Yes, when they realize they have all this FREE energy from **US**, of course they want to harness it. It starts with us not making it available.
I added an explanation.
I see us as “graceful” villains. By standing our ground, we don’t have to prove anything. Power just IS. I have an anecdote of a teacher who called other teachers into the office regularly because she got her juice out of bullying the staff in front of the principal. I could tell she was really excited for my turn because I had never bowed to her pressure. She attacked what she claimed were my deficiencies. I calmly addressed them and said she needed to work on her tone because it could be disrespectful. I walked out with a graceful, powerful dignity, and she never tried to bully me again. You’re right that, through our example, we show others that they, too, can love themselves more by not accepting intolerable behavior from others.
Anti-hero? And I really appreciate your point-of-view; thank you.👍
Villains tend to be misunderstood, unless they are actually evil.
like the grinch or professor snape
Or Elphaba
@@Uranianth Snape was an arsehole though. I wouldn’t call him a villain per se but he was a very questionable person.
The Grinch? He was right all along 😂
@@buscaquenoestoy harry potter named his kid after snape. did you watch the whole series? lol.
@@Uranianth I read and watched every single book and movie. I said what I said. Snape was an arse who liked to bully little kids.
I'm in that era now! I'm a compassionate villain!
Same!!!! INFJ Villains UNITE!!!!!!!
Right... I just heard the kid Batman cartoon song in my head. Wow, that must be some early 90s ish. I don't think I'm a villain. U just be like not feeding my soul dough 🧘🏻♀️
Everyone around us has judged us for trying to get off the hamster wheel. When we started doing something different and living a life that they couldn't understand that they were not used to. Eight years in we're happy observing alone and no longer lonely.
We have a do no harm and take no shit attitude. Our happiness is no longer dictated by anyone outside ourself anymore. We've had enough of being used, abused and misused. Being an Awakened Empath has freed us. The rabbit can easily become a cobra if pushed there.
Well you've spoken to my soul, throughout the video. Thanks
I love this one Wenzes ! I’m in the middle of this currently and I have been making a series of Disney villain paintings that correspond with my journey. Grateful for your videos❣️
I entered my villain era when I had nothing left to give. The illness created a pause in which I had time to reconsider all my actions and attitude. On the other hand, I'm not so sure that in the past others really considered me a good person. But I'm sure that now I don't care what others think because now I know myself better.
I was sooo GASLIGHTED by my family or origin for ANY angry display while THEY were truly Outrageous. To this day, my sister blames ME for all her life's problems LOL while screaming at me (see Angelica Rugrat) 😤😜 I had to consciously realize how small I've made myself and my beliefs to accommodate HER big voice.
Just entered my villian era when I noticed a friend of mine was playing with my emotions in order to backstab me
Better abandoned by another than abandoning ourselves.
It is not that most people are so perfect anyway.
So there will be clashes but i had other motives for behaving like i did and it may surprise those who tried to be iny way for such a long time and they lost
After trying to be nice so many times, I finally told a woman in my building "I am a person, I am not a trashcan for your toxic relationship. Please stop contacting me, you are being inappropriate." (I think you all can guess the type of backstory, you lived it too...) and her reply was "Are you THREATENING ME?" Oi vey... I just said not a "threat, just the last time I set this boundary. Don't contact this number and thank you for leaving me alone."❤
Danke! Das musste ich heute hören... Nic
Ich auch!
Ich auch😊 4 Personen ( davon 2 aus der Familie ) haben sich bereits „verabschiedet“ 😂😂 🙏🏼
You're not the villan if you are yourself. Other people are the villan, if they try to manipulate you in something you're not, into something that's not your nature.
Will you stop trying to define what is a “villain” or what it means for other people? If you don’t like it, if it doesn’t apply to you - don’t use it.
@jenofire8724
So you think she is a villain just for being herself?
Interesting standpoint. 🧐
Thank you! You have no idea how much all of this knowledge helped me understand where I need to work on to move out of that place I’ve been stuck. I’ll listen to this again. Thank you, I have been listening and learning a lot from your channel.
The villain tends to be more interesting than the hero
The so called “hero “ to the world, is a human . He can lie ,be insensitive and abuse .
Every story has two sides
And more tragic
No it's not. It's the plot twist u never saw coming that's interesting. The fallen 1. The one who can exhibit everything & takes a turn. The good gone bad the bad gone good full circle. The 1 who always keeps u guessing. Not that I try to be that way. It's just I know that's what I like in movies. The ones that r unpredictable. Although there's levels to it. Id say the actual villains "" fr, in real life.. u barely hear about r the ones that r actually scary. I mean the 1s that r from the experience, & have some kind of training. Not just greedy ppl who got mad over some shiny next thing or wever pointless material thing
I see, and feel that I'm in my villian era. Its not like I don't care about others because I do, but I care about myself more. Also, its also biblical too.
"...Love others, as you love yourself..." Matthew 22:39
💜
Just have to say this....the new lashes are GORGEOUS!!! 😍
You are one strong woman, Wenzes!!! I LOVE your energy, your wisdom, your sovereignty; you clearly are standing in your POWER!!! March onward and upward..........
I’m in my villain era and I’m starting to see people backing away from me. It only makes me stand taller and I’m definitely a threat especially at work. I work my ass off every day and the people I work with don’t.
A couple weeks ago, my co worker told me “you work too hard. It makes the rest of us feel ashamed.” Instead of apologizing, I LAUGHED and said “get on my level”
I feel soo much better when I connect with you.
I really do. Thank you soo much 💜
Life experiences have made me hard. At 71 I was an INFJ before it was commonly known like it is today. I have learned to live by the seat of my pants, and to toughen up as well.
Dont care anymore I'll be a villan to everyone by maintaining hard boundaries. 😂❤
You're right, great topic!
We often quickly convince ourselves that we're destined to save everyone, but real transformation happens when we embrace our humanity and allow our inner light to guide us. It's okay to own the energy of the room sometimes, even if that means it comes at the expense of others.
Great, Informative Video.
Gratitude.
At 65 I'm finally healed enough to be fine with being the villan and I am. My in laws have designated me the villan and have lied about me. I'm done and door slammed them. I feel so good now.
I started that unconsciously in 2012 when I just upped and moved 800 miles from family who was using me. I had absolutely no peace when home (I travel for my career). So I moved literally 2 weeks after I’d had an epiphany.
Those family members realized what and why… tho it took them awhile. I only came back in 2021 when my daughter’s health turned dangerous. We still had ups and downs but I stood up to her. Sadly, she crossed last August. I miss her dearly. I’m helping her adult children cope (that INFJ that I am) but I’ve set boundaries. I spend a lot of time quietly in my room and taking care of my space. It’s working for the most part.
We get to be the villain when others refuse to look in the mirror and we refuse to allow the delusions but stand in truth.
As a person who keeps scoring this idk how to take it, tbh. I use key words & Idek I am... That's just me being me 🙄. .. W/ that said, I'm not ideal or a perfectionist. Some of the comments I see, id never think they were similar or relative to me. If I'm requiring intuition, self reflection, patterns, etc etc. no, I'm prob not seeking idealism & perfectionism. If being 42 & being a single mom yet again , struggling, & still have not owned anything, not even establishing some way more comfortable than above average wage is ideal & perfectionism then I clearly must be doing this all wrong. Everything else mistakened is on others. All I'm just simply doing is trying & weeding out what's not good for me. trying to narrate My life & ish. Try your own for a change & then maybe some folks would realize I'm not the problem.. Me not being entirely open for my own damn safety isn't the problem. Ppl easily being swayed by fake & temporary mannerisms is. I don't think I'm the one who's always being played. I mean, I stay to myself too. So there's always that. But stay excited anyways. It's dense
I left my toxic family for my children and m children ended up toxic anyway and now I’m the villain … thank you for helping me let go 🙏🏻💜🧘♀️
I still continue to be grateful for this channel that has been on point as far as unpacking the stages I have been journeying through. It just makes me feel grounded. Thank you once again.
You knocked this one out of the park Wenzes, thank you for sharpening the tone of this message into an evolved nature, rather than just the softness and altruistic way that keeps us numb. F it, let's go for it. Yes, I'll write that article and story and share it.
GIRL!!! ❤❤🎉🎉🎉❤❤❤ one of your best ever
Also
You look smooookin! Hihihi
One way for me that I focused on recently is to not respond to fake flattery. That is when some narcissist is testing you to see if you're gullible. Once you accept the flattery you are implying that this person is trustworthy. That is an important step in their plan to torture you.
😳. You are so spot on. 😢. Thank you … Now I have finally found my peace. Having your channel has helped me so much ❤️❤️❤️❤️
I'm done with my villain era.. Its tiring..I think I'm wiser now. I don't want to wake up the sleeping monster again.. lot of love ❤❤❤
How many double standards does it take to get to the center of a remarkably patient INFJ ?
1,000%...pray for the abusers once the infj has had enough....interesting how the infj understands this...which can extend the abuse until enough is enough
Wenzes! You are always right on time❤
I never saw your work before. You were in a dream I had last week and now I know you came from here. Your hair was very long and you smiled at me. Your content means a lot to me. In Peace I wish you Peace in the Future.
Excellent Wenzes. I can't understand how can it be that you post every day videos that past so much with my daily life! It helps so much thanks
You might find some excellent material with Carl Jung’s “Shadow Self”❤
This is so interesting!!! I feel like that's what I've been doing for the last few years, being more selfish. Unfortunately, it didn't help me, I didn't feel any better. Also, I discovered my main inner child has psychopathic qualities, which is the complete opposite of me (of course, LOL!). After watching some interviews with psychopaths who've learned to fit into society, I realized I need to accept some of those qualities into my life because being too "good" isn't that great either. I'm not explaining it very well, but thanks for this video (and all your videos!!). I've known I was an INFJ for 30 years, but I didn't really know what that meant except that there wasn't very many people like me in the world. I started doubting it because I didn't really connect with the info in books about it, but you explain it in a way that I totally recognize, and makes me feel calm & empowered!
This is so on time… just pushed back on my mom who literally belittles me non stop and was having guilt trips. I’m definitely a slightly collapsed infj
This is absolutely great content and well timed. Thank you so much!!
So true, thank you... LOVE the image of only giving from an overflowing cup. I always felt I should be giving, even if the cup was completely empty.
Yep. Thug era. I have been collecting the bad vibes now that I don't play small and dim my lights to create comfort for them. This video rang true on many levels. Well. Many people that I have assisted can really do for themselves. It's not sustainable to give and give while they do for themselves.... It leaves me emmmmmpty! Thank you! Cheers! Thug out! Hahahhaahahah.
wow, you really are badass ❤💪
Thank you sooooo much! Since two days I thought I am on INFP. Found your page just helps me and myife. Thank you.
Entered villain era 6years ago, got out of it 3 years ago after Jesus came into my life. My villain era was absolutely vile and I didn’t realise how terrible of a person I was and all the people I’ve verbally and mentally flogged bare skinned because INFJs know exactly how to hurt others when they WANT to hurt. Jesus put a stop to it and I have never been more grateful for His redeeming grace. My life has been transformed and my villain era is behind me, my counsellor era ahead of me.
I'd love to see you offer a course on INFJ entrepreneurship, providing practical and realistic advice. That would be incredibly valuable in my opinion💜
Regardless, I appreciate all the advice you've shared - it's made a big difference
Amazing, and so based. I needed to hear this so bad bruh-- thank you sm Wenzes🙏
You're amazing, thank you
Sovereign Energy is so powerful.
Benevolent Villany! I love it! 🫶🏽
Perfect timing wenzes! Thank you for this 😍😍 working on it because im on this phase on my awakening infj journey 💪
Same bro🙏
@wajidhaider1488 wow congratulations bro 💪
Whew, I really had a hard day today. I needed to hear this. Thank you, Wenzes.
I appreciate this. Of course, the timing is perfect as always. I am willing to be the anti-villain. Like Batman, someone who thrives on living on the edge; willing to piss off people for the greater good.
From Canada: Sounds very American.
He hides in the darkness. And no one really knows what he does. Basic dude during the day. Hero during the night.
This is perfect. Right up my alley. Thanks!
Oh, I'm 100% in my villain stage, and make no apologies. I'm still a good person, and I still have a good heart, and I absolutely despise the position I've been put in. All I wanted was peace in the last few years of my life, and I'm not going to get it. Personal interactions aside, we're on the verge of a literal civil war in our country. At this point, only bad people are going to see me as a threat, and I don't have to go into politics for you people to know who I'm talking about. There are no INFJs in the current enemy camp because people like us don't act like them.
Thank you.
Most of my family just haven't seen the direness of what is happening or focus only on the immediate current event. I am exhausted from warning them all for over a decade now. Did I act? No, I kept the peace. I aquiesed. Now, my partner sees our very future being threatened and are still barely taking any action. Some if my M aga family are just hiding their head in the sand or are stubbornly doubling down.
I want to protest, but will it matter at all? No one around me is doing anything, just doing status quo.
I'm okay with being a villain if the grievances are unreasonable. I've never had any real issues with anyone willing to consider other views or meet halfway. If anything, disagreements only serve to strengthen those relationships. The more extreme, duplicitous, or predatory a person is the more they tend to despise me. 🤔
When i finally absolutely knowledge how good i am. I start makeing a Lot of fun been the quick smiling sinical responder to others been unrespecting twored me. Gosh! so many years i didnt knew how fast and smooth i am in this kind of interaction.
Thanks for all your hard work and efforts really helped me too understand why everything is the way it's actually going you help me with understanding the connections that are costing me so much in this world of Betrayal
God Bless you and your Family Windy please stay safe
I really enjoyed this.
villian mode loading ⏳💟😈
If someone didn’t like something about themselves. They could always change that thing they don’t like about themselves.
Currently in my villain era. Im fine with it.
Relating so hard right now!
Love this. The world is a manipulative and competitive place. So if you not going to live on Mars then accept that
The villian is the wrong word to describe what you speak of by definition, but I get it
I've been doing number 4 since childhood.
Your words remind me of my old days when I used to work nine to five, now $93k fortnightly, retired my parents and in good health!!!❤️
OMG! How did you do it
My husband and I raised 350K in 31 days, Amanda Michele Summers gets the glory! Because she changed our lives. It all started right after my wife's old friend from college introduced us to her and as of then I was drowning in so much of debts, but now! 😊 Well as of last weekend, I got my dream home, and a car. This isn’t a promotion but just a reminder to have faith and keep pushing forward!!!
What a crazy coincidence! I know Amanda M. Summers too! I started with just 3.000, and the results have been absolutely jaw-dropping. I never expected this, but here I am-completely blown away by the outcome!
What an inspiring accomplishment! It’s truly motivating to see such incredible success, and it fills me with excitement and anticipation. I can’t wait to embark on a similar journey, apply myself with dedication, and witness the amazing possibilities that lie ahead. The thought of what I could achieve keeps me eager and driven to take the next step!
Is there a possible means for me to get connected to her!!!! I need her impact in my life Please 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
Excellent! I recently made a small shift with my long distance partner. I stopped taking every call, not to be mean or spiteful, it was a reminder to myself that I can set the pace. I don't need a call every day at the same time and I'm not waiting around for one. I have not been asked a single question regarding my change, I have not attempted to explain myself. It's empowering.
It's over...
Good video, thank you. I´m learning more about me... and its funny going over various situations from ones past with this in mind. I will say burning it all down has unfortunately had some collateral on occasion, and that has been difficult to handle.
18:27 exactly wow
i'm a villain inside and it is going to blast out one dwy - infj
This is wisdom ....
REMEMBER: others will ACCUSE you of being wrong ( a villian )... especially the criminal minded
Yes
Thank you Wenzes. This is the one i wamted to hear
Thank you!
It's a part of life and you can learn from it 😊. Switch it on and off anytime 😁🎉
That's very true 💯
If you're seeing this message, it's a sign from the universe to read the book 5D Reunion Protocol and get your SP back ❤️
"we are there, witnessing"
Walls high around our energy.
It is rare it is potent and introverted emotional sponge: can deplete 'easy.' quickly. People don't have typical access to me, because I'd rather actually put in the time to make a difference and secure my own energy and effectiveness (than be a social butterfly) exactly, it's totally a necessity; it's funny too, that cup metaphor is strong, as in the Christian walk we are taught to flow over to others because our own cup overflows when in Christ. As infj, born again, I think it a little like my cup overruneth, but it can't fill or stay full if someone is poking holes in the bottom, or cracks in the side which it a little like how being social feels-- pressure and energy pick up results in cracks a leaking I need to come away and repair that stress with quiet rest and alone time
Good. I can be a villain. I know energy, freedom, life and truth.
I love to kick ass and chew bubble gum.. and I'm all out of gum.
Btw you're awesome 😁
Great video! ❤
Perfect timing love
I know,, I know,, gosh,, I need more infjs. Please. Ok I'll go now. But this can be kinda tricky.
Put this in tact Before we need to do this.
Indeed.
Great video
I have started telling people that I find shallow and trite that they can stop communicating with me anytime they want. Is that odd?
I am kind to them, but don't really respect them any longer. Finally, I guess they made a "New Years Purge" of me, because their daily trite "live, live, laugh" texts were no longer given to me.
I suppose my saying that to them could have been hurtful, but it was honest.
But any in-depth discussions I tried to broach were "too much" for them.
Sigh. Smh
Very true....
That's exactly what I'm going through. Tomorrow my sister will come visit, from another city, and she is a bully, she usually pushes me around.
She'll get a surprise when she gets here. Hee Hee....😏
✨🕯️💥💫✨ thank you 🙌‼️💫✨
You are my personal shrink 😅